funny jokes to tell doctor

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March is the time when we celebrate Doctors’ Day. What better way to celebrate that than with a few good jokes? Some are great one-liners, some help you make fun of yourself, and some are just irreverent. That’s necessary actually, because without some self-deprecating or gallows humor, how would you ever get through the life-and-death nature of your everyday work? Here are some doctor jokes and doctor puns; feel free to memorize them and spit them out to your colleagues at the most inopportune moment!

A man goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. He hasn’t been feeling well and wants to find out if he is ill. After the checkup, the doctor comes out with the results of the examination.

At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other. The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. As they sit down at the restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands.

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After dinner, one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel bedroom. Just as things get hot, the female doctor interrupts and says she has to go and wash her hands. Once she comes back they go for it. Once they finish, she gets up and says she is going to wash her hands.

Dad’s pager beeped, summoning him to the hospital, where he is an anesthetist. As he raced toward the hospital, a patrol car sped up behind him—lights flashing, siren blaring. So Dad hung his stethoscope out the window to signal that he was on an emergency call.

A doctor accidentally prescribes his patient a laxative instead of cough syrup. Three days later the patient comes for a check-up and the doctor asks, “Well? Are you still coughing?” The patient replies, “No, I’m afraid to.”

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A man goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. He hasn’t been feeling well and wants to find out if he is ill. After the checkup, the doctor comes out with the results of the examination.“I’m afraid I have some bad news. You’re dying and you don’t have much time,” the doctor says.

A woman says to the dentist "I don't know which is worse having a tooth pulled or having a baby."The dentist says "Well make up your mind I gotta adjust the chair!"

How many doctors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.

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