funny jokes about history

February 24, 2023 Post a Comment

Henry Viii History Nerd History Jokes History Puns

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Elderly Man: “Father, during the war I allowed a Jewish refugee to live in my attic.”Priest: “I do not see anything wrong with that. You helped a poor soul survive the war.”Elderly Man: “I collected rent from him for every month that he stayed.”Priest: “That’s not a good thing you did, but it was for a good cause. You helped him survive.”Elderly Man: “Should I tell him the war is over?”

Two Russians are queueing up for bread in Red Square.‘**ck this’, says one, ‘I’m going to go and shoot Yeltsin’ and he storms off towards the Kremlin.Fifteen minutes later he returns and silently re-joins the queue.‘Well?’ asks his friend. ‘Did you shoot Yeltsin?’‘No chance. The queue was twice as long as this one’.

On that note, here’s another Soviet one I’ve always liked.A man from the Soviet Union obtains a permit to move to the USA, and his new neighbor asks how he much he likes his new apartment, so he asks him what his apartment was like back in Russia.“Oh, my old apartment was perfect. I could not complain.”So his neighbor then asks him what his job was like back home.“Oh, my old job was perfect. I could not complain.”So the neighbor asks him what the food was like back in the USSR.“Oh, the food was perfect. I could not complain.”Puzzled, the neighbor finally asks him, if everything was so great in the Soviet Union, why did he move?The man says, “Here I can complain.”

Can Stop Laughing History Textbook History Jokes American

An American man and a Soviet man are arguing over who has more freedom.The American says, “I can walk up to The White House and yell ‘Reagan is a disgrace’, and nobody can do anything about it.”The Soviet man says, “I can do the same thing! I can walk up to the Kremlin and yell “Reagan is a disgrace’, and nobody can do anything about it.”

But you know, the longer you listen to this abortion debate, the more you hear this phrase “sanctity of life.” You’ve heard that, “sanctity of life.” You believe in it? Personally, I think it’s a bunch of s**t. Well, I mean, life is sacred? Who said so? God? Hey, if you read history, you realize that God is one of the leading causes of death. Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Christians, all taking turns killing each other because God told them it was a good idea. The sword of God, the blood of the lamb, vengeance is mine, millions of dead mother***kers, all because they gave the wrong answer to the God question: “Do you believe in God?” “No.” Boom! Dead. “Do you believe in God?” “Yes…” “Do you believe in my God?” “No.” Boom! Dead. “My god has a bigger dick than your god!” George Carlin Quotes from his Comedy Back In Town

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History is an important part of human life, but we tend to remember only a few things, usually the more vicious or salacious parts. History is a huge field and is filled with amazing puns and jokes. Discover the best history jokes and the people who made them.

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Whether you are a history buff or not, you have to appreciate some of the jokes that have been made about it. Whether it’s about history in general or a specific individual, there is no shortage of jokes out there.

History is filled with some of the best and most interesting people that have ever existed, with each of them bringing something new to the table and changing the world as we know it. This was the case with the famous people on our list of history puns, who changed the world through their inventions, discoveries, and wisdom.

We hope you enjoy our collection of funny history jokes, puns, and one-liners. You may also like chemistry jokes and math jokes, or if you want something different, cheese jokes will definitely melt your heart.

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